“by Carolyn Hedley”
Most of the time, reality seems clear-cut and obvious, right? But have you really thought about how much of reality we're seeing and how much we're perceiving? We perceive and even create our own reality affecting our relationships, our work life, and our personal life. We turn perception into fact without us even knowing it. You can see how this may become a problem in our lives. In fact, this is how cognitive distortions come about. In this blog, I'll be talking about what cognitive distortions are, 10 examples of cognitive distortions, as well as ways to recognize and change these thought patterns.
What is a Cognitive Distortion
If you've looked into cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), the phrase cognitive distortions may sound familiar. A brief definition of a cognitive distortion is an irrational and perceived thought that we take as fact. Even though these thoughts are entirely perceived usually without any evidence, we take them as the absolute truth. We become stuck in these negative thought patterns and many people, especially those with anxiety, depression, and other mental disorders, will feel trapped within them.
As you can imagine, this greatly affects our mental health. What CBT therapists do is help clients recognize the distorted thoughts and change them to more positive ones. This way we can filter our perceptions from the facts.
Browse through this list and see if you can recognize the thought patterns that you've had.
All or Nothing Thinking
This is also called black and white thinking. It means that you look at a situation in absolutes. Either something is right or wrong. If you're not a success then you are a failure. This is a very limiting way to think as you discount other possibilities in a situation.
Example: You trained diligently for the chance to win a marathon and when you competed in the race, you came in second place. You think, “I’m loser because I’m not first.” Even though second place is still worth something.
Over-Generalization
With this distortion, you’ll view a negative situation as a stream of never-ending negative situations. A person with this cognitive distortion may say "This always happens to me" or "This never happens to me." This kind of thinking takes any control you may have over the situation away from you.
Example: You frequently stop by your favorite coffee shop before work. On one particular morning, a woman is taking a long time ordering and you’re concerned you might be late. Exasperated, you think, “This always happens to me.”
Mental Filter
With this cognitive distortion, you’ll filter a situation and focus solely on the negative. You may make a mistake on a task and instead of thinking about the many good things you did, you focus on that single mistake.
Example: You’ve prepared a presentation to give for work and, understandably, you’re nervous. You gave the presentation and accidentally slipped up on a word. At the end of your presentation, many co-workers speak to you about the good ideas you presented. However, you’re beating yourself up over the slip up you had during the presentation.
Discounting the Positives
With Discounting the Positives, you dismiss any positive things you've done. This is actually quite similar to the Mental Filter cognitive distortion, but there’s a difference and you’ll see it in the example below.
Example: You received a perfect score on a test and thought to yourself, "Well the test was extremely easy and I was really lucky in a lot of those answers." You aren’t counting the time you spent studying or taking notes.
Jumping to Conclusions
This one is fairly obvious and there are actually two kinds of jumping to conclusions
Mind reading - You assume you know what others are thinking and believe that others are thinking poorly of you.
Fortune telling - You assume you know something bad is going to happen.
Mind Reading Example: If you wave to a person who doesn't wave back, you may jump to the conclusion that they don't like you or are personally snubbing you. However, they may not have seen you.
Fortune Telling Example: If you have a speech to give and you're nervous, you may feel like it will be so obvious that you're nervous and everyone will judge you because of it. You’ve already decided the outcome before anything happened. However, you could sound calm and confident. Even if you do slip up or sound a little nervous, people will be understanding because speaking in front of others is universally terrifying.
Magnification and Minimization
With this distortion, you may magnify a situation to be greater than it is or minimize the situation to be less than what it is. These often go hand in hand.
Magnifying Example: If you're a shy person, you may believe that this is a terrible flaw that is shameful and abnormal. In this case, you’re greatly magnifying a trait that you perceive as a flaw.
Minimizing Example: You may minimize all of your social strengths such as your humor or kindness, believing they don’t make up for the one big flaw you’re magnifying.
Emotional Reasoning
Because you feel a certain way, you believe a certain thing. Basically, your present feelings are dictating false facts of the situation to you. You may tell yourself, “I feel dumb and therefore I am dumb.” Anyone else hearing that Nirvana song? Just me? Cool.
Example: If you feel overwhelmed, you may believe your problems are unsolvable. While it may feel like your problems are unsolvable, once you ground yourself and focus you may find that you can solve the problems even if they’re difficult.
Should Statements
With should statements, you criticize yourself and/or other people by using the words should, ought, must, or have to. This one deserves two examples because it’s that common.
Example 1: You may tell yourself that you shouldn't feel so anxious and feel like something is wrong with you.
Example 2: You may believe that you should always look confident and never look foolish.
Labeling
With this distortion, you identify yourself or others from a generalized and perceived flaw or shortcoming. By doing this, you misjudge others and yourself. This also deserves two examples.
Example 1: You may think that because you're shy you are a weirdo and an awkward person.
Example 2: You notice that someone at work left a used paper towel in the break room. Because of this, you believe this person is a slob. However, the person may be quite tidy but just didn’t realize they left their paper towel there.
Blame
In this one, you assign blame for problems in your life. There are two versions of this.
Self Blame - You beat yourself up when you make a mistake. You'll also blame yourself for things you aren't in control of and aren't responsible for.
Other Blame - You blame others for negative events without taking any responsibility yourself or accepting that it was in no one’s control.
Self Blame Example: Someone ate your lunch at work and you think, “It’s my fault for not writing my name on my lunch box.”
Other Blame Example: You ate someone else’s lunch at work. When they confront you about it you say, “It’s your fault for not specifying it was your lunch by writing your name on it.”
How Do You Correct Cognitive Distortions?
The first way to correct them is to notice them. Start paying attention to what you’re saying to yourself. By being mindful of your inner dialogue, you’ll be able to pinpoint cognitive distortions.
Once you start recognizing them, it’s time to put them to the test. Challenge these thoughts by asking “where is the evidence to prove this?” or “Is there more to the story I’m not considering?” Collect only the facts about the situation and compare the facts to your perception. The best way to beat a cognitive distortion is to challenge it with the truth.
Finally, replace the cognitive distortion with a different and more positive thought. So let’s take the example from Over-Generalization. You believe you’re always held up in a line before work and are almost late because of it. Does this really happen to you every day? Did this happen to you the day before?
Once you challenge the distortion with the facts, you can change it to something more realistic and possibly find a solution to a problem. With our example, you could say, “I’m not stuck in line every day, but it does happen sometimes. If it becomes frequent, maybe I can come into the shop earlier to buy my coffee without worrying about being late for work.” With this thought, you’ve not only defeated the distortion, but you’ve also taken control of the situation and came up with a plan.
Even recognizing cognitive distortions, we won’t always be perfect in fixing them. If you’re feeling overwhelmed by your negative thoughts, consider attending counseling. A therapist can help you identify cognitive distortions and give you the tools you need to change your negative thought patterns.